It Makes Scents!

Do smells trigger memories for you?  They DEFINITELY do for me. 
Whenever I smell coconut, I think of being on a beach in Mexico with my Aunt Christie's family on our cruise.  Whenever I smell the Eau de Parfume "Exclamation" or "Sunflowers" I am whisked back to my teenage years and I remember going to the dances and flirting with boys.
Today I was surprised by the memories that came to me as I heated up my new Scentsy warmer.  The scented wax that I put in it is called "Thunderstorm" and I was amazed by where that smell took me.  I was sitting in my family room when all of a sudden I smelled flowers after a thunderstorm.  This scent is beautiful in and of itself, but for me, all of a sudden I could see my Great Grandmother whom I called Nana.
That scent whisked me away to my own little daydream where I was a child and I would have sleepovers with her.  I remembered visiting her and taking my numerous boyfriends to meet my Nana.  I remembered visiting her every week after my doctor's appointments when I was pregnant with Abby.  I remembered the look of concern on her face as I endured labour pains during one of our visits.  I remembered watching her with tears in my eyes as she held my firstborn in her arms and asking her who she thought Abby looked liked.  I remembered giggling when she replied that she looked like a baby and that I shouldn't expect her to look like anyone but herself.  I remembered looking out Nana's windows and seeing some sort of squirrel, bird or chipmunk that she had adopted (or that had adopted her) and watching her enjoy the various noises that they would make.
The reason I think that this scent reminds me so much of my Nana is because it really does smell like flowers after a thunderstorm.  The smell is so vibrantly rich and fragrant that it smells like the many flowers that my Nana always had around.  I can never remember a time when my Nana wasn't surrounded by plants and flowers.  I have always tried to grow flowers in my yard as a tribute to her, but somehow, having this scent in my house, I feel as though she is here.
And so I love it.  I am very glad that the girlies and I chose to have this scent around.  Hopefully as they get used to the smell it will give them many memories of their own, and I will secretly feel as though my Nana has a hand in their lives.
I am so glad that I bought so many packages of this scent!  It will be nice to feel as though my Nana is around again.

My World

This last weekend, we took the kiddies up to visit my Biological Father, Jeff and his family.  It was a fun weekend seeing their house and where they live and spending time with them.  I enjoyed watching my girlies cut out paper doll clothes with Jeff's wife.  I loved watching them wrestle on the ground with Jeff and his son.  I loved listening to Otto tease their family and ruffle their feathers a bit.  I especially loved being there with them and visiting with them.
It has been quite a few years since we have been able to go and visit them for a weekend and this past weekend made me realize how much I missed that.  I always have a hard time leaving them because I have so many different emotions and lots to think about whenever I am leaving.  I get very quiet on the car ride home because I just sit there and think the whole way home.
Growing up I have been extremely blessed to have a family who loves me.  My dad adopted me when I was 3 years old and has raised me as his own daughter.  Most people don't know that I am not his biological daughter and he has always made me feel as though I am.  I grew up being best friends with my cousin from that side and being surrounded by tons of cousins on that side.  I have always felt as though I was completely loved and accepted.  I have never lacked for affection or guidance from any of my family members and I have never been made to feel as though I was not a part of the family.
I can only imagine what my Grandma and Grandpa Lee thought when they heard that my dad was dating someone who was divorced and had a daughter, but they have always welcomed me with open arms and have never made me feel as though I was different.
However, I am a little different.  I consider myself to be extra lucky.
You see, I have an extra parent who has loved me for my whole life even though we didn't have any contact with each other from the time I was 3 until I was 18.  It is a really strange feeling to know that there is someone out there whom you don't really remember who loves you too.  I have often wondered, growing up, what Jeff was like.  I wondered who he was and if he missed me and if he ever wondered about me.
I consider myself to be very lucky that he did wonder about me and love me and that we have been able to establish a relationship.  I feel lucky that he is there because he seems to be one of the few people who can actually understand why I think a certain way and my entire thought process.  It is a strange connection, this biological one.  It is one that I have struggled with for many years.  In the past couple of years, I have come to terms with who I am and my unique position of having a family who loves me with my 3 sisters and my brother and another, kind of more extended family whom I also love.  I have been blessed to have the opportunity to get to know Jeff's family better.  They don't replace my own family.  They are different from my own family, but they are a part of my life. 
I can only explain it as being the same as when you have children. When you have your first child, your whole world is that child.  You wonder how you could love anything else as much as that first child. . . until you have another child.  Your love for that first child never diminishes, but somehow your heart is able to grow and you are able to love the other child(ren) just as much as you love that first child.  Even though they are not the same person, you are able to love them for their differences.  You are able to love their strengths and their weaknesses.
I never chose to be in the position I am in, but I am happy that everything has turned out to be for the best.  I love having my siblings and watching them grow up, get married, have children (which I spoil A LOT), go on missions and have good relationships with them.  But I also love watching Jeff's family as they have grown up and are now facing adulthood.  I love having one of my half-sisters live in Calgary so that I have someone to play with and help out when she needs it.  I love developing a different relationship with her as we are getting to know one another better.  I like having a friend in Jeff's wife.  I know that having me around can't be the easiest thing for her, but I feel lucky that she has taken the time to become my friend and she always treats my kids so well.  She is a quiet person so I know that having us around is really going out of her comfort zone and she has no idea how much I appreciate all of the work that she does when we are around.
This is a post I have been wanting to write for a long time so that maybe my friends and family can get a little glimpse into my little world.  Being a child of divorce is not unusual in this day and age, it definitely affects the children who come from that marriage, however, I believe that I am one of the fortunate ones who has been blessed by my circumstance.  I hope that one day my children can know how lucky they are to have so many people who love them.  I hope that because of my circumstances that they can grow up and be understanding of all children who come from all different types of families and I hope that they can understand how lucky they are to have the family that they have.

A Love Affair

Last weekend. . . . or maybe two weekends ago (I can't really remember). . . . I had the opportunity to go to the Calgary Home and Garden show.  My cousin's husband gave me 2 free tickets and so I wanted to use them to see him in action and to check out all of the cool booths that were there.
For those of you who don't know, I am currently trying to design my family room and even though it is almost done, I am just needing a couple of finishing touches. . . . you know. . . . small things like blinds, curtains, statues, candles and stuff!
So, I grabbed a friend and we went.  It was a fun evening, and Weston (my cousin's husband) did a great job talking about perennials. 
However. . .
That was the night my love affair began.  You see, at one of the booths was this sleek, hot, steamy worker..  He was there showing off his abilities to clean floors with non pressurized steam.  I fell in love, and I fell hard.
He was a dream come true.
I immediately gave him my number and everything else that he needed and I went home.
I felt a little guilty as I walked in the door of my home because of my strong feelings, but they were short lived because as soon as Otto met my new guy, he kind of fell in love too!
I've named him McSteamy because he gets really hot and steamy all over my floors.
He really gets around at my house, but he doesn't seem to mind and neither do we.
He is my new Steam Mop, and I am completely having a love affair with him and will never go back to regular mopping again!

The Baby

3 years ago I wasn't feeling well and decided to go into the hospital.  3 years ago, my doctor made a decision that has completely and forever impacted my life.  3 years ago, I almost lost one of the most important people in my life.  3 years ago, I had a miracle and my life has been better ever since.
Lee was born 3 years ago!
It was the scariest moment of my life, and finding out from the doctor that he almost died has always stayed with me.  I truly believe that Lee has a guardian angel and that he is destined for something great.
However. . . .
Until that happens, he is my baby!  I know that to look at him you wouldn't think of him as a baby, but he is.  Lee is the only one of my children who has always loved to cuddle up with me.  He is the only one who asks for a nap with me so that we can lay down, sing songs (his favorite being "When Somebody Loves You" from Toy Story of course) and read books.  Lee is very smart and lives in his own imaginary world.  Sometimes when he is off in La La Land, I will sit and just marvel on how vivid and real his little imagination is to him.  He creates the most interesting stories and interactions in his head and is perfectly happy to just sit down with a couple of toys and play.
My Lee is a gentle soul.  He will fight when provoked, but he is a sharer.  I have never had a child who actually shares this well at this age.  Lee loves his siblings, but especially Abby and watching the way the two of them interact reminds me of how I used to be with my youngest sister.
So, as I look at this incredibly HUGE toddler and watch him grow up, I can't help but think to myself. . . . "You're still my baby".

Back to normal

I know that it seems as though I have been talking about being disorganized a lot lately, but I think,  my friends, that it is coming to an end!
As many of you know, I am a HUGE fan of meal planning.  I write up a menu for 2 weeks and go grocery shopping only twice a month.  When Otto lost his job in November, I never knew when money was coming in or how much money would be coming in and so I didn't want to spend all of our money on groceries in case we needed it for something else.  It was hard on me because I felt as though my life was in a state of chaos because I never knew what was going to be made for dinner.
Once Otto got his new job things still kind of were up in the air for awhile. . . . .
and then on Tuesday I did it!
I did my meal plan and went grocery shopping!  It was probably the coldest day of the year, but I bundled up the boys and braved the cold weather and did it!!!
Let me tell you, making that grocery trip has made all of the difference!  I now feel more relaxed and in control. 
Yes, my house is still in slight chaos. . . .
Yes, there is still mountainS of laundry all over the place . . . .
Yes, my table is covered in scrapbooking supplies from my class development that I have to get done by the end of the week. . . .
Yes, my ear is sore from all of the phone calls I have been making. . .
. . . but I feel in control and relaxed because I now have groceries!
Life is back to normal!