A Little Story

I know that I haven't posted in awhile, and it isn't because I have had a lack of happenings around here. . . just the opposite, in fact.  However, I wanted to tell you this little story because I have only told very few people this story, but it concerns something that I feel strongly about.  So, have a good read, and feel free to post your comments after you have read this post.  I think that this is a great topic for discussion.
This story is true and it takes place about 5 1/2 years ago.  Being the mother of 3 beautiful girls, I felt as though I had faced quite a few trials.  The biggest trial being the birth of my third daugher, Caroline.  I feel as though I went through Hell and back just trying to bring this beautiful blond hair, blue eyed little girl into the world.  I knew from the moment that I saw her that she would be my trial.  I still don't know why I thought that at the time, but I still believe that my sweet Caroline was chosen to be my daughter to keep me humble.
Anyways, 5 1/2 years ago, my Caroline got sick and had flu-like symptoms and a high fever.  Being the young, protective mother that I was, I held my little girl night and day and I made sure that she was getting her fluids and was nice and bundled up.  She was, after all, only about 6 months old and that was all that I knew to do.  Because I didn't want to bother the doctor, I didn't make an appointment for her to see him, and I figured that this fever, like all of the other ones my girls had previously experienced, would also pass without any incidents.
Boy was I wrong!
After about 3 days, I felt really strongly that I needed to take her to the Children's Hospital.  I was very worried about her, and she must have showed some signs that she was getting more sick because I am not a big fan of visitng the hospital and I felt as though I was there at least once a year (and I was!!!).  But, ultimately my concern for my little girl overpowered my stubborness and I packed myself an overnight bag and drove to the Children's Hospital for what I knew would be a long wait followed by more long waits.
Once we got to the hospital, we stood in the line and waited for the triage nurse to do a preliminary check-up on her and direct us as to where we needed to go.  I remember this night as though is was yesterday (which is interesting because I can barely remember yesterday, much less 5 1/2 years ago. . . that shows how much this affected me.).  The triage nurse directed us into a triage room where there were 5 other sick children in beds divided by curtains.  Caroline was acting thirsty and so I got her a bit of apple juice as directed by the triage nurse.  And then all of a sudden I was looking at Caroline and it felt like my soul was saying good-bye to her.  I don't know why I started doing that, but it seemed as though I was watching her die.  To anyone else, it would have looked as though she was sleeping, but I knew that something was wrong.  Luckily for me, the triage nurse just happened to be walking up to our bed at that time and she grabbed the doctor as Caroline started to have a ceasure.  I was quickly pushed out of the way as they grabbed her and took her into the emergency room and started pumping her chest and sticking tubes in all sorts of places, and giving her needles and doing all of these crazy things to her.  No one said a word to me.  Every eye was on Caroline and my heart was beating as fast as her little heart was.  I knew that something had gone terribly wrong, I just didn't know what it was because all I could see were people in scrubs, tubes, monitors and blood.
Finally things seemed to settle down and people started to leave the room.  I think that's when someone remembered that I was standing there in the corner, white as a sheet and very scared.  A doctor, a resident and a nurse all came over to me and started asking me a ton of questions.  They then explained to me that they had no idea what was wrong with Caroline, but that her fever was so high that it had caused her body to start shutting down and that was why she had siezed.  They didn't know if or what the long term effects would be, but they knew that it was definitely the fever that had caused the ceasure.  The doctor, nurse and resident all then proceeded to explain to me that when a baby has a fever, you shouldn't keep them warm and bundled up, you should do whatever you can to cool them down.  Who knew?  I certainly didn't.  I certainly didn't realize that something as common as a fever could cause me to almost lose my little girl.  I felt as though I had failed her.  I felt as though I had caused it.  And I vowed that I would never feel like that again.  I would do whatever it took to keep my children safe, even if it meant researching something as mundane as a fever.
The reason I am sharing this story with you is because of this. . . when I made that vow to myself, I soon realized that even though I couldn't have prevented the fever from starting, I could have learned how to control it.  There were people out there who knew what I needed to do and they had information for me to be able to help my child.  I just needed to reach out and do something about it.  What's my point?  It is this. . . I am a very strong believer in vaccinations.  I believe that the medical professionals have been researching diseases and their causes and effects for a very long time.  I truly believe that when they strongly recommend that children should get vaccinated at certain ages that there is a reason.  I don't believe that one doctor decides on a whim that a certain age is appropriate for a certain vaccination and because everyone else likes the idea it becomes accepted.  I believe that there are certain laws and practices in place to prevent that from happening.
That being said, I also believe that there can be reactions to certain vaccinations.  I also believe that those reactions are the exception and not the rule.  I have also come to believe that sometimes people can overreact when one of these exceptions occur and then try and convince the major population that the vaccinations are not a good idea.  I personally have seen the devasting effects that some of the diseases that my children are vaccinated against have done to those who have had the strength to survive the diseases.  The long-term, lasting effects of these diseases is something that cripples these survivors for the rest of their lives.  As a mother, I do not want anything like that to happen to my child . . . especially if the answer to preventing these terrible effects is as simple as a free vaccination that is readily available to my child.  I could never live with myself if my son or daughter died from something that could have easily been prevented if I had taken the time to get them vaccinated.
The vaccines that are given to us, and especially children have gone through extensive testing and retesting and have had to pass through a series of approvals before they can be available to be used as a form of preventative medicine. 
I never thought I could lose a child because of a fever, but I almost did.  I truly believe that Caroline's disorders that she is now living with are a direct effect from that fever and ceasure that she endured that night in the hospital.  I could never live with myself if she had died from something that I could have prevented.  She is a constant reminder to me of how important it is to make sure I know all of the facts about something, even if it seems to be something that I see every day.  You just never know what could happen.