Birthday Party for the Monkey

Ok, so we FINALLY had Caroline's birthday party yesterday.  Her birthday was in September, but MAN that month flew by too quickly!  I was EXCITED!!!  I actually splurged and spent a LOT of money to have her birthday party at a place called "Color me Mine".   I have NEVER spent this much money on a birthday party, but my Caroline LOVES to do art and this place lets you paint pottery and then they fire it in their ovens and you get to keep your creation forever (or until a sibling breaks it).
The big day arrives and Caroline is on cloud nine ALL DAY.  From the moment she wakes up, the count-down to the big party begins. . . . . and then it is FINALLY time!  Otto and Lee went to Abby's basketball game, so it is going to be just me, 8 kids and Suzanne.
So, I arrive at Color me Mine with 3 of my kids and 1 of the other party-goers at the same time that Caroline's other friend arrives.  We are all smiles as we walk into the store with great anticipation of what is to come.  We are greeted by a staff member who asks us if we were here with the birthday party.  With eager smiles we all reply that we are. . . . . and then. . . . I am berated in front of the kids for arriving at the place TOO early.  After promptly sending the kids to the van to watch a movie so that this staff member doesn't completely ruin my daughter's day I proceed to explain to the staff member that I was actually asked to come 15 minutes early to help with the set up.  After not being able to calm this woman down I tell her that I will simply wait in the vehicle with the 6 eager children awaiting the begining of what is about to be the funnest birthday party EVER!!!
So at 4:00 ON THE DOT, we walk in (I am now nervous that I am going to be yelled at again) and we see ourselves to the birthday party spot.  A very nice girl takes the kids' names and then we go and pick out our pieces that we are going to paint.  By now it is 4:10 and we are still missing a girl and Suzanne.  I am kind of worried about Suzanne because I knew that she had a long way to drive, but I decide to suggest to the girl that we get started. . . . only. . . . where was she?  She had simply disappeared.  Don't worry, I have amazing tracking skills and I track her down and suggest that we get this party started.
Our hostess starts putting colors on the kids' painting palletts and then leaves.  Yep, that's it.  No explaination of what to do;  no explaination of how to layer the paints;  no explaination of how you need to paint lots of layers in the darker colors. . . . . what do you do when your little dot of paint runs out?  Good question, right?  So, I take over. . . . . since she is off helping any and all customers that are in the store, I figure she wouldn't mind.  There are lots of staff members in the store but they all seem to want to hang out in the back . . . . I mean why should they be on the floor?  There is only a birthday party (which is supposed to have it's own exclusive staff member) going on as well as a full store.
Wait. . . . .where the heck is Suzanne?
Also, I paid for 8 kids to come and one didn't show up. . . . .Abby didn't get to come, can I maybe take something for her to paint when she can come in at a different time?  So, I ask our hostess (who has graced us with her presence) and after making her do some investigations and me arguing that I have already paid for it, I am given permission to take a piece for Abby to paint.  (She is going to love it!!!)
Suzanne?  Where ARE you????  Wait. . . . is that my phone ringing?  YES!!!!  It's Suzanne!!!  What?  Suzanne had called the store and they denied that Caroline was having a birthday party there?  Huh?  They told you that they weren't just off of Beddington Trail?  What the *!@#&^%?????
YOU ARE A TROOPER SUZANNE FOR PERSAVERING AND COMING ANYWAYS!!!!!!
Ok, so the kids are done painting, Suzanne and the girlies are here and the pizza man is standing around for someone to talk to.  Excuse me two randomly standing around staff members who are visiting with each other. . . . . can one of you please take care of the pizza since it is included in my party and I really don't want to pay for it twice?  Are you REALLY asking me if I want to serve the pizza or if I want you to?  Doesn't it clearly state on your website (where I booked the party) that YOU will serve the pizza that I bought?  Ummmm don't the kids get juice boxes, as well?  Oh they do?  Why didn't YOU think of that????
Geee. . . . . it's sure taking a long time for us to get our gourmet (and very expensive) cupcakes that I had ordered. . . . wait . . . . what's that I hear????  The two of you who are standing around talking in the back room are eyeballing some beautiful gourmet cupcakes?  NOW WHO COULD THOSE BE FOR, I WONDER??????  Oh. . . . wait. . . . WE ordered those cupcakes.   YES we would like to have them.   Hmmmmm there seems to be an extra cupcake because one of our kids didn't show up. . . . . maybe SUZANNE and I can have it instead of you guys getting it!  I mean, I only paid THROUGH THE NOSE for it.
What's that???  You want me to take care of the bill now?  Ok, not a problem!   Caroline can open her presents while I do it.  Whoa. . . . what do you mean the $100 deposit that it clearly states you charged me at the time of the booking hasn't been charged?  Ummmm. . . . it clearly states on you website that I am charged the deposit at the time of the booking. . . . NO, I don't want to talk to the owner, but you guys should definitely get that fixed. . . . What???  The phone is for me????  Who is it?  The OWNER????  Ummmmm ok, I guess I WILL talk to him.  Oh what's that?  You have the perogitive to charge me the deposit if I don't show up but you don't charge me it at the time of booking?  Maybe you should state THAT on your website.
I also thought that it said that the staff members would make Caroline a present. . . . maybe I just made that up. . . . I DO sometimes do that.  I will check on that when I get home.
FINALLY we are all packed up and ready to go!!!  I only have to drive 2 extra kids home.  What the . . . . ?  The van won't start????  ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME????????  DUSTIN QUIT THROWING BATTERIES AT THE GIRLS!!!!  Otto, can you PLEASE come boost me?
 . . .
10 minutes later and many choruses of Purple People Eater later the red headed staff member comes out. . . . what's that?  You forgot to get Caroline's handprint for her present????  BOY are you LUCKY that I am still stranded here.  She will have to climb out the front door though as my sliding doors are power doors and will not open with a dead battery.
And then HE arrives.  We are SAVED!
Driving home I ask Caroline, so what did you think of your birthday party. . . . her response????
IT WAS THE BEST BIRTHDAY PARTY EVER!!!
So worth it.
(I will NEVER do another birthday party at Color Me Mine though)