Messiah

Well, it seems as though it is that time of year again. The time of year where I sing in Handel's Messiah. I have done this for 9 years now, but it seems as though every time I sing in the choir different parts of the Messiah touch me. This year I have really been touched by the part that we sing while Christ is going through the Atonement. This has been a really emotional part for me because the reality of Christ's Atonement has really hit home. I almost dread singing those songs because I know that it will stir up a whole schwack of emotions for me that I don't really want to deal with in front of 700 people.
I love music. Music has always been able to touch my heart the way that no other medium can. I also love Handel's Messiah because I feel as though I am privileged to be able to sing about the Savior's life for 3 hours every weekend. The scriptures in the oratorio have taught me things about the Savior that I probably wouldn't have realized by simply reading them. I don't know why music can make things so clear for me, but it can. I am in constant awe of the power that music has.
Every year, before we perform Messiah, we hold a testimony meeting with the choir before we begin and it really helps to bring the spirit into our performance. Last night, for some reason, I felt strongly that I should bare my testimony. I was shocked when I realized that I had stood up and gone to the front of the room. I really don't fell comfortable baring my soul to a bunch of people that I don't know, and I am still amazed that I managed to do it. The spirit was really strong during the testimony meeting, however when we were singing the Messiah and we got to the Atonement part where it says "Behold the Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world" and then continues through the Atonement, I was a mess! I had tears streaming down my face and I couldn't really see the words. Thank goodness I have sung in the choir for so many years that I pretty much have it memorized, but I really didn't think that I was going to get through it.
However, as I have found out many times before, just when we think that we can't do something, God opens a door and gives us the strength to go on. I was really thankful that He helped me so much last night because otherwise I think that I would have hid in the back corner of the choir seats and not finished singing the Messiah.
When the performance ended I felt so much happiness and peace and I was really glad that I had sung in it this year. This coming weekend we have our last two performances and I am only going to be able to make it to the Saturday performance so hopefully I will be able to make it through the oratorio without falling to pieces this weekend!