It's days like today

You know, it's days like today that make me hold my children a little tighter and notice more of the qualities about them that make me love them. What's so special about today you ask? Yesterday, a little boy named Carson who had lukemia passed away at 2:30 pm. He was 5 years old. But, children die every day, what is different about this one? The difference is that I got to read his story. His mother has been here with him and staying in the Ronald MacDonald house ever since he got transferred here from B.C. when his cancer went out of remission. Today I had planned on going over to the Ronald MacDonald house to make dinner for the families staying there while their children are in the hospital because Carson's family is a member of our church. We were planning on making it a special day for his mother because today is her birthday. Her husband even came out this week and so the whole family was going to be together and be able to have a minute away from the hospital and all of the doctors. And then everything changed. Carson took a turn for the worst, but he passed away peacefully in his mother's arms as she sang "I am a Child of God" which was his favorite song.
Even though this is not my story, this has hit me really hard because it brings back the painful memories of the day that I found out that my baby had died. She never got to live to the age of 5 even, and my story is completely different from this family's. And yet it feels so similar. I know how this mother will feel when her son's birthday comes around every year. I know how she will feel when she sees other children his age playing soccer, or graduating from school. I know how she will feel when she goes on vacation and thinks to herself that it would be even better if her child was there. I know the peace that she can feel if she decides to rely on her testimony and the comfort that the gospel can bring her. I know the peace that she can feel if she turns to the Lord and asks Him to help her through her trial. I know the feeling of complete and utter love that she will probably feel as people tell her how much they love her and her family and how much they wish they could do something.
It has been an emotional day for me as I think about what this mother is going through. No one. . . and I mean NO ONE should EVER have to bury their child. It doesn't feel right. Even though we know that they are happy and at peace, it is the hardest thing that you will ever have to do in your life, and I sincerely wish that no one ever had to go through it. So for today I will spend a little more time basking in the warmth of my newborn's smile, listening to my girls sing as they play with each other, and grab every hug and kiss that is offered to me today from my children and hope that they last forever!